Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Preston is back after five weeks in Oz. I was the only sober one in the house last night. She drank a bottle and a half of red and S downed at least five Rolling Rocks while we watched a few episodes ofBlack Books and The Muppets. Somewhere in the middle while Preston was passed out on the sofa, inadvertently mooning us with the crack of her ass, S reprogrammed her phone into Turkish. Later in bed S told me that he put frozen food into her bed. This frightened me. I have a lot of food in the freezer. "What specifically did you put in her bed?" "I don't know. A leg thingy." "My leg of lamb! You put my lamb in her bed! You go get it. Go get it right now. That was too expensive to waste. That's a week of food for me. It cost fifteen quid!" "You spent fifteen pounds on a hunk of meat?" "Do you know how many meals I can get out of that?" "It's like the Farmers Market all over again." "No it isn't. It's actually cheaper when you see how many meals you get out of it." "You're going to eat lamb for a week." "No I'm not going to eat it for a week! I'll eat it for a few days and freeze the rest. I have done this before." "Okay." "Now go get it out of her bed!" "I didn't put in her bed." "Oh. What did you do?" "Put some shoes and my pants in there." (Pants=underwear) I waited until he was asleep and snuck down to look in the freezer to make sure my lamb was safe. It was but S's pants were now in there as well. I chuckled to myself and shut the door. This morning S brought the pants upstairs. "Preston put them in the freezer." I giggled. "I know." "Agghhhhhh. You didn't take them out?" Later Preston was disappointed when she heard that the underwear wasn't frozen solid. I told her that she narrowly escaped the leg of lamb. She was impressed. "Wow...That would have been like waking up to a horses head. . . Godfather style. I declare shenanigans!!!!!" I have a feeling that I will become a friendly fire casualty. . . from both of them.

4 Comments:

At 2/07/2006 01:57:00 PM, Blogger Stu. said...

My vote is we stick Thomas in the freezer.. Hell she's small enough!

 
At 2/07/2006 06:18:00 PM, Blogger LateAgainLucy said...

Nicole,
It sounds like you are having a blast over there! Frozen undies and expensive meat, but best of all...Black Books!! We love that show, but can only get Series one here. Still hoping we can manage to get over there soon...in addition to all the perks I really miss Bernard, Manny and Fran!
Please keep up the great stories...they help me when things get mired down here!
Ta
C

 
At 2/07/2006 07:05:00 PM, Blogger Nicole said...

Isn't Black Books great? S introduced me to it last spring. Good luck on the potential move!

 
At 2/08/2006 10:33:00 AM, Blogger Preston said...

I mooned you guys? People would pay good money to see that!

 

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